Self Care - Nourishment

Self-care is important for all of us caregivers, if we are unable to take care of ourselves, we’re unable to take care of our loved ones. And for some reason, we’re the hardest people to prioritize.

What have you done for yourself today?

Sit with yourself for a moment and ponder the questions: "What have I done for myself today?" and “What do I need today?” Often the answer can fall into one of three themes: nourishment, connection, or regulation. These themes of self care sometimes overlap, intersect or support one another. In this post, we’re going to focus on nourishment.

Defining Nourishment

Identify what are the things needed for survival. And then figure out healthiest or most enhanced, level up version of that.

Nourishment for the body

Prioritize sleep – lack of sleep has a negative impact on our mind and body. Find a system that works for you - nap when baby naps, sleep in shifts, sleep train, hire a night sitter, pump or give formula at night so your partner can feed - find a system to make sleep a priority. You need sleep to survive.

Hydrate - level up that water to tea, or a smoothie. Get a water bottle you’re jazzed about. Leave water bottles squirreled throughout your home – where you pump, where your kids play, near your desk, etc. Find the biggest barrier to hydrating and eliminate the barrier.

Eat well - Focus on foods that support you feeling good - physically and/or emotionally. Ideally both! Food is fuel. If possible, stay away from ultra processed food.

Movement –Stretch, dance, walk, jog, lift, ride your bike. Think what would feel good for your body and pursue that activity. If you’re still recovering, walking to the mailbox might be enough. Meet yourself where you’re at.

Hygiene – Something about taking a shower makes us all feel a little better. Use your favorite nourishing soap, shampoos and lotions. Brush and floss your teeth.

Massage/Spa – If you can get away, let someone else take care of you. Receive nourishment from someone else. Get a hair cut, a massage, pedicure, sauna...

Dress for comfort – To feel nourished, dress for comfort! Honor whatever stage your body is in, whether you’re pregnant, recovering, breastfeeding, or not feeling too hot in your own body, wear what feels comfortable. Even if it is nothing.

Refrain from substances – using substances can be taxing on your body to process and recover from. In this chapter, we’re looking to nourish, not add to the recovery. 

Nourishment for the Mind:

Rest – sleep is good for your body and your mind.

Regulate your nervous system - focus on minimizing or removing what feels overstimulating. Tap into rhythmic activities (rocking, swinging, walking, music, etc.), deep breaths, and movement.

Practice Radical Acceptance - Radical Acceptance is accepting what you cannot change and being at peace with what is challenging.

Tailor Social Media - Sometimes social media is makes you feel better, more connected and nourished. Do you need to edit your content and algorithms, cut back on how much you’re using it, when you’re using it, or cut it out entirely? My general rule of thumb, if the social media account is trying to sell you something, assess if it feel predatory.

Nourishing Books – ask yourself if you need an escape, to experience wonder, or learn something new. Visit your local library or ask a friend for a book recommendation.

Nourishing Streaming - Again, be intentional with your content! 

Journal – be reflective, slow down, assess without judgment. Identify what you need to process, what you don't want to forget, and what you wish you could forget.

Create Art – draw, make music, sing, dance, write…

Therapy – find a therapist that specializes in this chapter of your life through the PSI Directory. Or contact me if you’re in North Carolina.

Nourishment for the Spirit

What connects you to your higher power? Do you need to meditate

Practice Mindfulness – mindfulness is noticing without judgment. Complete a body scan and assess what your body is feeling. Sit on the porch or in the garden and notice how the wind moves through the land, how the pollinators visit the flowers, how the birds find their breakfast.

Practice religion – if you find strength through organized religion or religious texts, lean in.

Sit in Nature/Forest Bathing – Forest Bathing is not an actual bath, but spending time in the forest. This is an evidence based, mindfulness practice that gets you connected with the present moment.

Connect with the Awe of Life – Awe is the sense of wonder and can be a wonderful antidote for ennui and depression.

Pursue your Passions: You are still you, even with a little one to take care of. Give yourself grace though; your passions and hobbies may look a little different. If you’re a runner, this may not be the season of your life to attempt ultramarathons. But it is reasonable to go for a jog with baby in the stroller. If you’re a painter, you may not have 10 hours to spend in the studio anymore, but perhaps you can find a few hours to get away and paint.

What next?

If you’re reading the list and telling yourself none of this is practical, it may be time to ask for help. From your community, family, friends or a therapist. Contact me if you're ready to begin. Or find a therapist in your area.